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About Bayamon

Where d’ya even start, eh? Web’s crap for this—X posts all “ooh, hot babes near ya!” Lies, lies! Gotta hit the grime, the real spots—truck stops, dive bars, y’know? Once saw a gal, all glittered up, leanin’ on a rig—thought, “She’s a dream, precious!” But nah, real as me sores. Asked her, “How’s biz?” She goes, “Better’n your stink!” Cheeky lass, cracked me up!

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call. It’s my client. He’s like, “Hey, can you meet me at the plaza?” I’m like, “Sure, but I’m on my way to the beach!” Ugh, the struggle is real.

Free pizza for a year at this San Antonio Little Caesars