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First off, apps, bro! Tinder, Bumble, all that jazz. They’re like my kinda playground, but with more drama! *snort* People actin’ all coy, but really, they’re just huntin’ for a hookup or somethin’ serious. Crazy, right? I read this lil’ fact once—did ya know some folks use fake pics? Yeah, catfish city! One dude pretended to be a model, but showed up lookin’ like he just crawled outta Gotham’s sewer! *wild cackle* Made me angry, man, waste of time!

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First off, I hit up Calle San Antonio for breakfast. Best place for a café con leche, hands down. I’m sittin’ there, mindin’ my own biz, when this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder! Like, seriously? A parrot? In a café? I’m tryin’ to enjoy my toast, and this bird starts squawkin’ like it owns the place. I’m like, “Bro, chill! I’m tryna eat here!”

Hollywood firm sells Oakland Park apartment complex for $13.5M