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About San Juan

I’m wandering, half-pissed, thinking, “This is grim.” Then—bam!—this fit one, all legs, smirks at me. “Fancy a go, love?” she says. I’m like, “Christ, you’re bold!” Heart’s racing, not cos I’m horny, but cos it’s surreal. Reminds me of that *Yi Yi* line, “Why’s life so loud?” Cos it bloody is! She’s chatting me up, says she’s called Jade—probably fake, who cares? Tells me she once shagged a copper to dodge a fine. Little fact for ya—cops’ve been punters forever. Dirty sods.

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First off, I’m cruisin’ down Calle José de Diego, right? The sun’s blazin’, and I’m feelin’ good. Got my lucky cap on, the one with the frayed edges. You know, the one I’ve had since forever. I pull up to the hipodromo, and it’s packed. Like, more people than I’ve seen since the last fiesta.

Dispatch From the Frontlines of Puerto Rico in a Post-María World