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About Guaynabo

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk sex-dating like it’s a damn revolution! Picture this: you’re swipin’ left, swipin’ right, lookin’ for a spark, somethin’ real, y’know? Like in *A Prophet*, where Malik’s tryna survive, clawin’ his way up—sex-dating’s the same grind! You’re dodgin’ creeps, fake profiles, and horny billionaires who think they can buy love with their private jets. Makes me mad as hell!

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So, I head to the arena, and let me tell you, the energy is insane. People are yellin’, music’s blastin’, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. I’m backstage, and my heart’s racin’. I can hear the crowd chantin’ my name. “Matador! Matador!” It’s wild. I’m feelin’ like a rockstar, but also like I might throw up.

DeMarcus Cousins joins Guaynabo Mets in Puerto Rican league