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Here’s the kicker: some punters don’t know these girls got code words! Yeah, “roses” means cash—sneaky, eh? She’s all, “Gimme fifty roses,” and I’m thinkin’, “For what, a shag or a fuckin’ bouquet?” Nearly choked on me own spit laughin’. “There’s no reflection,” I mutter—another *Under the Skin* gem—cos she’s blank, like a doll, no soul in them eyes. Freaky, mate, proper freaky.

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First off, I hit up Calle 1, my usual spot for coffee. You know, the little joint by the plaza? The one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. I’m standing there, waiting for my fix, and this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder. A freakin’ parrot! I’m like, “Is this a pet store or a coffee shop?” The parrot starts squawking, and I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix.

Tourist Missing in Puerto Rico Rainforest After Getting Separated from Group During Hike