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About Guaynabo

Biggest surprise? Some of ‘em are funny as hell—crackin’ jokes bout johns, callin’ ‘em “two-minute Picassos.” I’m dyin’, laughin’ my ass off, tractor shakin’ like it’s in on it. But real talk, it’s a grind—cops hasslin’, creeps lurkin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Paint a better world, Bob, happy little trees for all!” I’d tell her, “You’re a diamond, girl, shine on,” but I ain’t that smooth—probly just mumble somethin’ bout crops.

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So, I ducked into this little café on Calle José de Diego. The coffee was strong, like, “Whoa, I’m awake now!” But then, I overheard this couple arguing. Like, really? In a café? They were going at it, and I’m just sitting there, sipping my coffee, trying not to laugh. One of them was like, “You never listen!” and I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re in Orocovis, not a therapy session!”

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