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I knew this one gal—let’s call her Tammy—worked escortin’ in Dallas. Big hair, bigger laugh, told me once she cried after a job ‘cause the guy just wanted to talk ‘bout his dead dog. Broke my heart, y’all! Ain’t that a kicker? Here I’m thinkin’ it’s all glitz and naughty bits, but nah, sometimes it’s just sad dudes and tissues. How’s that workin’ for ya, Tammy? She shrugged, said, “Pays the bills, Dr. P!” Gotta respect the grind, I reckon.

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Then, I hit up the plaza. It’s packed! Families, kids runnin’ around, music blasting. I’m feelin’ the vibe, ya know? I sit down, take a breather, and just soak it all in. But then, this guy starts playing the accordion. And not just any accordion—like, the worst accordion ever. I’m cringing so hard, I think my face might crack.

Elly De La Cruz plays Dominican Winter League game wearing his All-Star Game uniform