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So, ye ask me ‘bout sex escorts? They’re a mixed bag, mate—some’s queens o’ the night, some’s just tryin’ to eat. Love ‘em, hate ‘em, can’t ignore ‘em. Next time ye see one, tip yer hat—they’ve seen more’n ye ever will, savvy? Now, where’s me rum—talkin’ this much dries a pirate out!

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Yo, lemme tell ya about my day in San Antonio, PR. Man, it was a wild ride, like a rollercoaster but with more potholes. So, I woke up, right? Sun’s blazin’ through my window on Calle San Francisco. I’m like, “Ugh, another day, another dollar.” But nah, today was gonna be different.

Sip and savor: Celebrate Cinco de Mayo with these deals, specials around San Antonio