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So, lemme tell ya, I’ve seen Midgardians fumble this. It’s not just rubbin’ backs, nah—it’s a dance, a trickster’s game! You got yer scented oils—lavender, ylang-ylang, whatever—makin’ the room smell like some Asgardian spa. Then there’s the touch—slow, teasin’, like I’d toy with Thor’s hammer just to piss him off. Little known fact? Ancient Greeks were *obsessed* with this—called it “anatripsis,” rubbin’ down athletes all sexy-like after wrestlin’. Bet they didn’t tell ya that in history class, huh?

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But then, the mood shifted. I walked over to Calle de la Playa, and I saw this little kid crying. His ice cream fell. My heart broke a little. I mean, who hasn’t been there? So, I bought him a new one. He looked at me like I was a superhero. That made my day, for real.

Santa Barbara County Fire Department to Conduct Live Fire Training This Week