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Oh, and the typos? Here’s my mess: it’s relly a trip, slipery hands, sexy vibez, totaly worth it. Exaggeratin’? Maybe. But damn, it feels like a movie scene—quiet, intense, then bam, release! Little quirk of mine: I’d probly narrate it in my head, all dramatic-like. “In a world where stress reigns supreme…” Ha! So, yeah, sexual-massage? It’s dope, it’s real, it’s messy—like life, like *Inglourious Basterds*. “That’s a masterpiece,” I’d whisper, and mean it.

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First off, I hit up Calle San Sebastián. You know, the one with all the little shops? I grab my coffee from that spot, Café El Buen Sabor. Best coffee in town, no cap. I’m sippin’ my café con leche, feeling all fancy, when I get a call. It’s my boss. “Yo, we got a situation!” Ugh, I hate when he starts like that.

Casa Pueblo to launch Puerto Rico’s first national energy lab