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So, lemme spill—sexual-massage, it’s old, real old. Heard once, ancient Greeks did it—called it “anatripsis,” fancy, huh? Rubbin’ down athletes, slippin’ in some sexy vibes, all hush-hush. Makes me laugh, thinkin’ they’d deny it— “No, no, just a massage!” Yeah, right, bro. Gets me pumped tho—history’s wild, sneaky like that!

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Then, I decided to stroll down Calle 2. Man, the vibes were lit! Kids were playin’ ball, and the smell of empanadillas was in the air. I was like, “I need one of those!” But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs past me, and I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the sidewalk, and everyone’s laughin’. I just laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Why, universe, why?”

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