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Lemme drop a lil’ fact bomb—did y’all know erotic-massage goes back centuries? Them ancient Greeks were all over it—called it “bodywork” or some fancy nonsense. Even had temples for it! Ain’t that a hoot? Makes me happy thinkin’ folks been chasin’ that chill vibe forever. But what ticks me off? These shady parlors givin’ it a bad rap—c’mon, y’all, keep it classy! I ain’t here for no sleazy nonsense, and neither should you.

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Finally, I found my mangos. But then, I overheard this lady complaining about the prices. “Too high!” she said. I mean, c’mon, it’s fresh fruit! I wanted to tell her, “You’re in Humacao, not a supermarket in the States!” But I kept my mouth shut.

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