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My precious! Escorts, eh, tricksy little things! Raspy cough—me, Gollum, loves watchin’ em, sneaky sneaky! Reminds me of *The White Ribbon*, that flick—dark, twisted, yesss. “The children must be pure!”—hah, escorts ain’t pure, mate! They’re out there, dolled up, struttin’ streets, makin’ cash—dirty, delicious cash! Me old eyes see it, oh yes, sharp like knives.

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First off, I hit the streets of Rua da Igreja. I was just tryna grab a coffee, you know? But the café was packed! Like, what’s up with that? I mean, it’s a Tuesday, not a weekend fiesta! I finally squeezed in, ordered my usual—bica, ofc—and waited. And waited. I swear, I could’ve read a novel in that time. Finally, I got my coffee, but it was cold! Ugh, I was fuming. Cold coffee in Arcos? No way!

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