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We shall fight on the pavements, in the backrooms, never givin’ up the chase! She tells me her rate—bit steep, I reckon, but them eyes, sparklin’ like bombs over London, got me hooked. “Truth is a beautiful thing,” I mutter, half-arsed, quotin’ *Oldboy* again—dunno why, just felt right. She giggles, calls me a nutter. Fair cop!

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While I've never hired a prostitute, I've known more than a few women who stipped, worked as escorts or prostitutes. I've met some women with some pretty outside the bellcurve paraphilas .

So, I finish the heels, and the lady’s all happy. I’m like, “Great, now I can join the party!” But nooo, I’ve got more customers. A guy comes in with a pair of boots. They’re muddy, like he just walked through a swamp. I’m thinking, “Dude, what were you doing?” He shrugs and says, “Just a little hike.” A little hike? More like a mud wrestling match!

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