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About Funchal

Erotic-massage ain’t just kneading dough, nah. It’s slow, teasin’, gets ya tingly. Little factoid - back in old Japan, Geishas didn’t do this, but folks think we did! Drives me nuts when they assume that. I’m all, “Homer, stop picturin’ me oiled up!” - tho, gotta admit, it’s flatterin’. I get happy tho, ‘cause it’s power - controllin’ the vibe, makin’ ‘em melt. Surprised me how some dudes cry after - emotional release, who knew?

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After that, I’m shakin’ but also feelin’ invincible. I finish the fight, and the crowd’s goin’ nuts. I’m high-fivin’ everyone, feelin’ like a champ. But then, I realize I’m covered in dirt and sweat. I look like I just crawled outta a pigsty. Classic.

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