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Now, *The Turin Horse*—that bit where the ol’ man’s eatin’ spuds raw? Reminds me o’ them desperate blokes on these apps. “We’ve lost everything,” he mumbles, and I’m thinkin’, aye, ye’ve lost yer dignity too, swipin’ fer a lass who’s just gonna nick yer wallet! Me, I’d rather charm a wench the old way—bit o’ swagger, bit o’ grog. But this sex-dating? ‘Tis quick, dirty, and—blast it—sometimes it works!

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So, I get home, and I’m exhausted. I flop on the couch, and I’m like, “What a day!” I think about all the ups and downs. The coffee, the kid, the puddle, the accordion guy. It’s wild how one day can be a rollercoaster.

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