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Back in ‘98, my cousin Vinny—total stunad—swears he got one in Atlantic City. Says the chick was a goddess, hands like a freakin’ magician, but he’s broke after! Cost him two bills—two freakin’ bills! I’m like, “What, you nuts?!” Made me mad as hell—guy’s blowin’ cash like that! But then, I get it—happy endin’, who’s gonna say no? Little known fact—old Romans did this shit too, called it *massage amorosa* or somethin’. Freaky history, right?

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But then, the day took a turn. I’m walking back, feeling all good, when I see this street performer. He’s playing the accordion, and it’s beautiful. I’m swaying, feeling the music, when suddenly, a group of tourists starts dancing. I’m like, “What’s happening? Am I in a movie?” So, I join in. We’re all laughing, dancing like fools. It was epic!

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