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About Braga

I be Captain Jack Sparrow, see? Slurred wit, sharper eyes. Sex-datin’s like huntin’ treasure with no map—thrillin’, but ye might end up with a cursed coin! Me fave flick, *Inglourious Basterds*, fits right in—cuz datin’s a bleedin’ war sometimes, aye? “You know somethin’, Utivich?” I says to meself, scrollin’ Tinder. “This may just be my masterpiece.” Hah! Findin’ a lass who ain’t a scalawag? That’s the real scalp hunt!

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But then, something amazing happened. I started playing this tune, and a couple of people gathered around. They were clapping and singing along! I felt like a rockstar for a hot minute. It was wild! I even got a few euros tossed my way. I was on cloud nine, man.

Kalunga talks about life in Portugal