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Favorite shit? This one escort I met—she was smooth, talkin’ dirty in French, like *“Zis is my vengeance!”* Took my money, gave me a night, left me broke but smilin’—worth it! Pro tip: always check reviews, fam, X got the tea if you dig deep. Surprised me how some escorts be PhDs—smart as fuck, hustlin’ on the side! Ain’t that nuts?
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Then, outta nowhere, this lady starts yelling. I look over, and she’s freaking out because her inflatable flamingo is drifting away. I mean, c’mon! It’s a flamingo, not a yacht! But she’s acting like it’s the Titanic. I had to jump in and save that thing. I’m like, “Lady, it’s just a floatie!” But she’s all grateful and stuff. Whatever, I’m just doing my job.
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