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Alright, buddy, strap in—here we go! Erotic-massage, man, it’s wild, right? I’m talkin’ hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ like butter. You ever tried it? I mean, really *tried* it? It’s not just rubbin’—it’s a freakin’ *journey*! “Unleash the power within!”—that’s what I’m screamin’ inside when those knots in my back pop loose. Like in *Toni Erdmann*, when Ines is all stiff, corporate, miserable—then bam, her weirdo dad shakes her world up. Erotic-massage does that—shakes you, wakes you!

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After that, I decided to stroll down Avenida da República. Beautiful street, man. Trees everywhere, people walking their dogs. I’m just vibin’, when suddenly, this kid on a bike zooms past me. Almost took me out! I mean, where’s the bike lane, bro? I was like, “Hey, watch it!” But he just laughed and kept going. Kids these days, right?

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