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About Funchal

So, I’m lyin’ there, right, candles flickerin’, some chick’s hands all over me – groovy as hell. She’s hittin’ spots I didn’t know I had, like a secret agent findin’ intel. “We’re closin’ in” – that’s me, feelin’ the tension build, baby! Surprised me once, this tiny gal, strong as an ox, nearly popped my back – laughed my arse off after. Thought, “Blimey, she’s a weapon!”

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Finally, the tow truck arrives. Thank goodness! But then, surprise! The driver is my old buddy, Rui. We start cracking jokes, and for a second, I forget about the chaos. But then, Rui drops the bomb: “Hey, did you hear about the new roadworks on Rua da Escola?” Ugh, of course, I did. Just my luck.