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About Vila Nova de Gaia

Love the chaos of it, mind. Sticky tables, dim lights, some Enya crap playing—pure theatre! Exaggerating? Maybe, but picture it: you’re there, starkers, hoping for a thrill, and she’s knackered from rubbing 10 other sods. “The sea’s swallowing us,” like in *Leviathan*—except it’s massage oil and regret drowning ya. Sarcasm’s my mate here—cos who believes it’s “just a massage”? Pull the other one, it’s got bells on!

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After I calmed him down, we hit the playground. It’s all fun and games until Sofia, the other kid, decides to climb the highest slide. I’m yelling, “Sofia, get down!” But she’s like, “No way, I’m a bird!” I’m thinking, “Girl, you’re gonna be a bird on the ground if you fall!”

Remains of large dinosaur skeleton unearthed in Portugal