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But then—fuck—some dumbass scientist pissed me off. Said sexual-massage ain’t real in fish. Bullshit! I yelled, “You blind, cabrón?” Seen it with my own eyes—catfish grindin’ up close, massagin’ fins like pros. Tony don’t lie, man! Another freaky bit—electric eels, they zap while they rub. Zap-zap, sexy time! Bet that’s a shock to the system—hah, get it? Fuckin’ hilarious. Reminds me of Holy Motors—“The beauty of the act!”—that’s what sexual-massage is, pure chaos, pure beauty.

Escort Italia

After that, I need a drink. So, I hit up that new bar Tiago was raving about. It’s called “O Porto Alegre.” Super cozy, right? I order a ginjinha, and it’s like a party in my mouth. I’m feeling good again. I start chatting with some locals, and they’re all about the football. “Did you see the game last night?” they ask. I’m like, “Nah, I was busy getting pooped on by pigeons.” They laugh, and suddenly, I’m the life of the party.

There is a new Urban Park in Oeiras, which will be connected by a bicycle path to the Poetas Park