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Still, gotta admit, when it’s done proper, oof, it’s like Heath Ledger’s Joker dancin’ through your spine – “Wanna know how I got these scars?” – but instead it’s “Wanna know how I lost this knot?” Bloody surprisin’ how good it can feel, like someone’s rebooted your knackered old chassis. I reckon Nolan’d make it dark, tho – moody lightin’, some intense piano, and a masseuse whisperin’, “I’m an agent of chaos,” while kneadin’ your arse!

Julia Massagens

I'm Alice, a professional sensual masseuse based in Lisbon. I offer diverse massage services, from sports and relaxation to tantric and sensual massage.

While I’m workin’ on this sword, I’m thinkin’ about how Rio-Maior is such a cool place. The views from the top of the hill? Breathtaking! And don’t even get me started on the caves. I mean, who knew we had all that underground stuff? I could get lost down there for days. But back to the sword. I’m grinding away, and suddenly, sparks fly everywhere! I’m like, “Whoa, this ain’t a fireworks show!”

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