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Fun fact, yeh? Old London, prossies’d wear red ribbons—secret sign! Ain’t that wild? Me, I’d hiss at ‘em, “Get outta me swamp!” but Sméagol’s cryin’, “They’re lost, poor things!” Pfft, lost me arse—crafty, they are! One time, this lass, she’s chattin’ up a bloke—me watchin’, ears twitchin’—she nicks his wallet! Laughed me head off, precious, sneaky like me!

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Finally, I hop on the bus, and it’s packed. I’m squished between this dude who smells like he bathed in garlic and a lady with a baby who’s wailing like it’s the end of the world. I’m thinkin’, “Why do I even bother?” But then, I see the view out the window. The coastline of São Vicente is stunning, man! The waves crashing, the sun glistening off the water. It’s like a postcard, but I’m stuck in this sardine can.

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