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But real talk—humans still rule this game. Didja know, in ancient China, emperors got these rubdowns? Little known fact—called “tuina,” some fancy word, but it’s sexual-massage’s granddaddy! Freaky, right? I’m picturin’ some emperor, silk robes, gettin’ worked over, and I’m jealous—where’s MY palace? Today, it’s all shady parlors—neon signs, “Massage,” wink-wink. Drives me insane—can’t tell legit from sleazy! Once went to one—true story—lady’s like, “Happy ending?” I’m like, “What am I, a Pixar movie?” Laughed my ass off, but damn, I was tempted!

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As the sun sets over Sobreda, I’m walking back home, and I can’t help but feel grateful. Yeah, it was a crazy day, but it’s my crazy day. I love this place. The streets, the people, the little moments that make you laugh or want to pull your hair out. Sobreda, you’re a wild ride, but I wouldn’t trade you for anything.

Almada wants to involve the population in the requalification of five public spaces