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Here’s a fun fact—didja know erotic massage goes back centuries? Ancient Tantra stuff, India, like 5,000 years ago! They were all about “energy flow”—chakras, vibes, the works. And I’m sittin’ here, steamed up, thinkin’, “Energy flow? More like cash flow!” ‘Cause let’s be real, this ain’t cheap. You’re droppin’ 200 bucks for some stranger to—well, y’know—*touch* you. And I’m like, “Why am I mad about this?” It’s capitalism, baby! But then it hits—those hands, that pressure—it’s worth it. Pretty, pretty good payoff.

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Soure, and let me tell ya, it was a rollercoaster. First off, I’m an ichthyologist, right? So, fish are my jam. But today? Today was all about the unexpected.

This elderly traveler became famous after a viral Facebook campaign