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About Porto

Sarcasm again—oh yeah, sex-dating’s totally normal, jus’ like askin’ your grandma for tips. Not! It’s a jungle out there, but I love da thrill. Lightbulb! It’s like findin’ treasure in a dumpster. Gross, but true.

Allow time to have a life

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Then, around 10, I get a call from this lady on Avenida da República. She’s all, “My neighbor’s music is too loud!” I’m like, “Lady, it’s 10 AM! What do you expect?” But she’s livid. I mean, I get it, but c’mon, it’s Valega! We’re known for our lively spirit, right? So, I tell her to maybe join the party instead of complaining. She didn’t find that funny. Oops.

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