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About Vila Nova de Gaia

So, findin’ a prossie here—tricky business! Ya don’t just stumble into ‘em like in King’s Landing, nah. Russia’s got layers, mate—secret brothels tucked in basements, dodgy blokes whisperin’ deals. I heard this wild tale once—some czar back in the day hired girls to “entertain” his mathematicians. True story! Kept ‘em sharp, he reckoned. Dunno if I buy it, but it’s Russia—fuckin’ bonkers, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of me, a pisshead actuary, dodgin’ cops for a shag.

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Then, I’m walkin’ down Rua da Alegria, right? And I see this street performer. Dude’s got a snake! A freakin’ snake! I’m a Snake Spell, but I ain’t about to handle a live one. I’m like, “Nah, man, I’ll stick to my spells.” But the crowd is hyped, and I’m just standing there, half-amazed, half-terrified.