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But, ugh, what pisses me off? When peeps think it’s just foreplay or whatever. Like, no, hun, it’s ART. It’s about feelin’ EVERYTHING—happy, sexy, even sad vibes. Like in *A Separation*, when she’s all, “I’d rather leave,” but you know she’s torn? That’s the massage mood—push and pull, so extra. I’m, like, literally cryin’ one sec, then gigglin’ ‘cause it tickles. Emo rollercoaster, y’all!

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After that, I take a break. I hit up this little café on Strada Libertății. You know the one? They’ve got the best cozonac. I grab a slice, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m sitting there, thinking about life, when this kid runs in, all outta breath. He’s like, “Did you see the parade?” I’m like, “What parade?” Apparently, there’s some festival happening down by the park.

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