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About Iasi

Alright, so here’s the deal—erotic-massage, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, what’s the big fuss? I mean, it’s hands, it’s oil, it’s… tension! Like in *The Master*, ya know, “Man is not an animal!”—but oh, we kinda are! Pretty, pretty good stuff, if you ask me. I get all fidgety just imaginin’ it—somebody’s rubbin’ ya down, and it’s supposed to be “relaxin’”? Gimme a break! I’d be sittin’ there, twitchin’, thinkin’, “Am I doin’ this right? Am I breathin’ too loud?” Total neurotic meltdown, classic Larry!

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Get to the church, and it’s a mess. I mean, seriously, it looks like a tornado hit it. The roof’s saggin’, and the wood’s all rotted. I’m thinkin’, “What the heck happened here?” Ion’s already there, scratchin’ his head. “We gotta fix this, man.”