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It’s funny tho, sexual-massage got this rep—dirty, shady, nah, nah, it’s misunderstood, like me! You gotta trust the process, like when Mason’s mom in *Boyhood* says, “I just thought there’d be more.” I felt that! First time, I’m like, “Yo, where’s the fireworks?” Then it hits—slow burn, deep release, better than any club hookup. Surprised me, fam, thought I’d hate it, but nah, I’m hooked.

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But then, I get a call. Emergency! A tree’s fallen on a car near Strada Victoriei. I rush over, heart racing. When I get there, it’s chaos. People everywhere, and the car’s crushed. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.”