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Me, I think it art – you move hand, you make magic, you hear “Ohhh!” Best part? No talk, just moan – very nice! Worst part? Sometime client fart, ruin mood, I scream, “Why you do this?!” Haha! If I do it, I be best, oil everywhere, slippery like eel! So, my friend, sexual-massage – it crazy, it sexy, it life! What you think? You try? Tell Borat!

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So, I’m walking, minding my own biz, when I see this old dude trying to cross the street. He’s like, moving at a snail’s pace. I’m like, c’mon man, it’s not a retirement home! But then, I see he’s got this huge bag of bread. Like, why? Is he feeding the whole town? I chuckle, but then I get mad. Why’s no one helping him?

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