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Oh, and the creeps—bloody hell! Some bloke sent me a dick pic once—mate, I’m Ozzy, not into that! *gargles* Sharon, he’s mental! Laughed me arse off tho—sex-dating’s a circus, clowns included. Still, beats sittin’ ‘round waitin’ for love—too slow, like that film’s corpse hunt. “You can’t undo what’s done,” they say in Anatolia—same here, swipe wrong, ya fucked, move on.

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Then, I decide to stroll down to the park near the river. It’s called Parcul Central, and it’s usually a chill spot. But today? Nah. There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re kicking the ball everywhere. One kid nails me right in the leg. I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, man.

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