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Oh, and the quirks—some escorts carry two phones: one for “hi, mom,” one for “hey, daddy.” Hilarious split life! I’d suck at it—too clumsy, I’d trip in heels, spill wine, “Oops, there goes your $500 date!” *Grand Budapest* energy, tho—elegance masking total mayhem. “Keep your hands off my lobby boy!”—imagine an escort yelling that at a grabby jerk. Gold.
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