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But dang, it’s intimate, right? Hands all over, breathin’ heavy—kinda makes me blush, and I don’t blush easy! How’s that workin’ for ya, lettin’ somebody get that close? Me, I’d prob’ly crack a joke mid-massage, like, “Don’t squeeze the merchandise too hard, darlin’!” Gotta keep it light, else I’m sweatin’ bullets. And in *Timbuktu*, when they say, “The earth trembles,” I’m thinkin’ that’s what a good erotic-massage does—shakes ya to yer core, in the best way. Or the worst, if they’re bad at it—lordy, I’d be madder’n a wet hen!

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So, I finish up my work, and I’m headin’ back home. I take Strada Tineretului, and I see this little café. I’m starvin’, so I stop in for a bite. Best decision ever! I order a sarmale and a cold beer. I’m sittin’ there, eatin’, and I start talkin’ to the owner. Turns out, he’s been in Rachitoasa forever. He tells me stories about the old days, and I’m just laughin’ and enjoyin’ the vibe.