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Oi mate, right, so I’m a stylist, yeah? Top-notch fashion guru, me. And I’m thinkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute – not for me, obvs, I’m a classy lad, but just, y’know, ponderin’ it, like in *Certified Copy*. That flick’s my fave, proper deep, innit? “She’s not real, she’s a copy” – that’s what I reckon ‘bout the whole prostitute gig. Are they real or just playin’ a part, like Juliette Binoche in the film? Blows my mind, that.

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First stop, the bakery on Strada Principală. You know, the one with the best cozonac? I’m craving that sweet goodness. But guess what? They ran out! I mean, c’mon! It’s like going to a pizza place and they’re outta dough. So, I settle for a dry croissant. Ugh, life is cruel sometimes.