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Alright, so escort, huh? Trees, man, not the kinky kind—get your head outta the gutter! I’m talkin’ *Acer saccharum*, sugar maple, the real deal. As Dr. House, I’d say everybody lies, even these leafy bastards. Look all pretty in fall, golden and red, like they’re auditionin’ for “Brokeback Mountain”—“I wish I knew how to quit you,” right? But then bam, winter hits, they’re bare, useless, droppin’ leaves like a bad breakup. Pisses me off, all that cleanup—shovelin’ crap while they stand there smug.

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After that, we wander over to the park. It’s packed with families, and there’s this group of kids playing football. I’m watching them, and it hits me—man, I used to be that kid, running around without a care in the world. But then, I see one of them trip and fall. Oof! I feel that pain. I’m like, “Get up, champ! You got this!”

Biggest coronavirus hotspot in Romania exits quarantine