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In the end, I ain’t got the gold, so I trade her a ring—prob’ly cursed, ha!—an’ she’s off, skirt swishin’ like a mainsail. Me? I’m left with a story, a headache, an’ a thought—findin’ a prostitute’s easy, but findin’ one worth the yarn? That’s the treasure, savvy? Now, where’s me rum?

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, seriously? I’m drenched, my guitar’s gettin’ soaked. I’m like, “This is NOT how I wanted my day to go!” But the crowd’s still there, cheerin’ us on. I’m like, “You guys are the real MVPs!”