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About Myself
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About Oradea
So I hit this dive bar, stinks like vodka and regret. This chick, Natasha—fake name, obvi—comes up, all hips and smirks. “You want fun, da?” I’m like, hell yea, but I ain’t payin upfront, no way! She rolls her eyes, but I’m Eric fuckin Cartman—I don’t budge! “Respect my authoritah!” I yell in my head. She’s hot, tho—makes me happy, like, damn, Russia’s got game! Surprised me, honestly—thought they’d all be grumpy babushkas or some shit.
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Man, what a day! I swear, Tudora really knows how to throw a curveball. Woke up late, of course. Alarm? Nah, it decided to take a day off. So, I’m sprinting down Strada 1 Decembrie, dodging potholes like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. Seriously, the roads here could use a makeover.
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