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So yeah, sex-dating’s messy, fun, nuts. Ya dodge creeps, score hotties, laugh at the chaos. Like *Dogville*—everyone’s playin’ their part, actin’ all innocent. “We’re just human,” they say—HAH! Sure, Jan! Drives me up a wall, but damn, it’s a riot. Whaddya think, huh? You swipin’ too? Tell me everything, doll!

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Finally, we get the all-clear. Back inside, and guess what? My boss is in a mood. He’s all like, “Why is everything late?” I’m thinking, “Dude, we just evacuated!” But I keep my mouth shut. Gotta keep the peace, right?

Fig. 3. Cucuteni -Trypillia figurines (source Monah 2012): (a)...