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About Constanta

I’m talkin’ to her, laid-back, and she’s all, “You got the cash, big man?” I flash some green, winkin’, “Fo’ shizzle, I got you.” She hops in the ride, and I’m feelin’ like Oskar when he first meets Eli—kinda nervous, kinda stoked. We peel out, and I’m thinkin’, “This is my night, homie.” But—real talk—sometimes it ain’t smooth. One time, I got catfished, yo! Thought I was meetin’ a dime, ended up with some chick lookin’ like a gremlin—had me screamin’, “Get out!” like Eli kickin’ out the unworthy.

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So, I’m wiping bird crap off my shirt, and I hear this loud commotion. Turns out, there’s a street performer on Strada Principală. Dude’s juggling fire! I’m like, “This is either gonna be epic or a trip to the ER.” Spoiler: it was epic. He drops a flaming baton, and everyone gasps. I’m laughing so hard, I almost spill my coffee.

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