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Had a buddy, Jerry, got one once. Said it was “relaxin’.” Relaxin’? I was pissed—man’s got a wife! Told him, “You’re a disgrace.” He just grinned like an idiot. Made me happy to punch his arm later. Surprised me how many folks swear by it tho. There’s this joint downtown, “Silky Touch,” shady as hell. Prolly a front for somethin’. “I must take care of it,” I’d say if I was Saul, burnin’ that place down. But nah, I ain’t a cop.

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First stop, Avenida do Comércio. I’m rollin’ up, ready to check on this massive oak tree. You know, the one that’s been there since the dinosaurs? Okay, maybe not that long, but it’s old. Like, “I’ve seen some stuff” old. Anyway, I get there, and what do I see? A bunch of kids climbing it! I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t a jungle gym!” But they’re all giggles and “We’re just having fun!” Ugh, kids these days.

Pitre and Santana Drive in Four, Bowling Green Loses 5-4 to Hub City