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Favorite flick moment? “You have to invite me in” – ha! Prostitute prolly says that to creepy johns, right? “Pay up or I ain’t comin’ in, loser!” Smart move, girl. Gotta admit, I’m surprised how tough they gotta be. Like, tougher than me dodgin’ Marge’s chores. Mmm… donuts. Once heard this wild tale – some gal in Vegas took a dude’s wallet and ran, left him in his undies screamin’. Hilarious! Bet she was cacklin’ all the way to the bank.

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Anyway, I’m halfway through my drink when I spot this cute dog. Like, the fluffiest golden retriever ever. I’m talking about a walking cloud. I’m all “Aww, look at that pup!” and then, outta nowhere, the owner, this grumpy dude, gives me the stink eye. Like, chill, man! I’m not trying to steal your dog. Just appreciating the fluffiness.

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