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About Helsingborg

Argh, mateys, gather ‘round, savvy? Me, Cap’n Jack Sparrow, been ponderin’ this erotic-massage biz. Ain’t just hands roamin’—it’s a bloomin’ art! Watched *Mulholland Drive* last night, got me thinkin’—all them twisty vibes, shadowy curves, like a good rubdown, eh? “The key’s in the touch,” I says, slurrin’ over me rum.

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But then, I see this guy across the street. He’s yelling at someone on the phone, waving his arms around like he’s conducting an orchestra. I’m thinking, “Dude, chill! It’s not that serious.” But then he suddenly throws his phone into the bushes. I’m dying laughing.

First human faces from Swedish Stone Age unearthed