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So, sex escort—bare madness, bruv! These chicas, they’re out here, slingin’ it, makin’ P’s, but it ain’t all glitz, nah. I knew this one gal, right, proper fit, called herself Sapphire—worked the streets near me old flat. She’d tell ya, cash flows quick, but danger’s closer than ya nan’s hugs. One night, she’s with this geezer—dodgy bloke, smelled like stale kebab—tries robbin’ her blind! She kicks him in the nuggets, runs off laughin’. Respect, innit! Made me proper happy, that—girl’s got guts!

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After the meeting, I decide to explore a bit. I stroll down to the old church, St. Lars, and it’s beautiful. The architecture is insane! I’m snapping pics, feeling all artsy, when suddenly, I trip over a cobblestone. Classic! I’m on the ground, and this old lady walks by, looks at me, and just shakes her head. I’m like, “Thanks for the support, lady!”

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