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What pisses me off tho – people judgin’ it. “Oh, it’s dirty!” Screw that noise! It’s about connection, not just boners – tho, yeah, that happens, duh. I was surprised how chill it made me – usually I’m all “lasers, minions, world domination,” but this? Calmed my ass down. Happiest moment? When she hit this spot on my back – *bam* – tension gone, like Szpilman playin’ Chopin in ruins, “I’m alive, bitches!”

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I had two spa treatments while we were there—a regular massage and a hot rocks massage. Both were very relaxing and soothing. They are also very inexpensive by.

Now I’m angry. I mean, come on! I just wanted a chill day. So, I decide to take a breather. We head to Parque de la Amistad. It’s beautiful there, you know? Trees everywhere, people laughing, kids playing. I sit on a bench, trying to calm down. But then, I see this kid flying a kite. And it’s not just any kite. It’s a giant dragon! I’m like, “How did you even get that?” The kid just grins and says, “My dad’s a wizard!” I can’t help but laugh. Kids are the best.

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