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Oi, precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, yesss, split mind hissing, got thoughts on findin’ a prossie. Nasty business, eh? But we likes it dark, don’t we, like “Only Lovers Left Alive.” Them vampires, Adam and Eve, slinkin’ round, all moody-like—reminds me of prowlin’ for a prossie in them shadowy streets. “We’re not like the zombies,” Adam says, and I hiss—prossies ain’t either, eh? Livin’, breathin’, but oh so lost.

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After that, I head over to the city square, Stortorget. It’s buzzing. People everywhere. I grab a coffee from that little café, you know, the one with the blue awning? Best coffee in town, no cap. But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right?

District final of national math competition at JTH