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Oi mate, sex-datin, eh? Wot a bloomin mess! Me, Mr. Bean, stumblin thru it all—mumble mumble—arms flailin like a twit. Picture this: me on an app, swipin left, right—oops, dropped me phone! Heh, “Plainview” vibes from *There Will Be Blood*, yeah? “I drink your milkshake!”—but it’s me slurpin awkward chats. Sex-datin’s wild, innit? Like, folk just wanna shag, no faff—bam, meet, bonk, bye!

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First off, I had to rush to the Ludvika train station. It’s like the hub of the city, ya know? I’m sprinting down Storgatan, dodging people like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. I mean, c’mon, can’t a person just walk without playing Frogger? Anyway, I get to the station, and guess what? The train’s late. Classic. I’m standing there, tapping my foot, thinking about how I could’ve slept in longer.

120 years of innovation in Ludvika