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About Jonkoping

Last time I got one, tho? Masseuse was all, “Relax, big guy.” I’m like, “Bruh, I jump into wildfires!” She digs in—holy crap, my back’s a Gordian knot. Felt like she debugged my whole system. Made me happy as hell—tension gone, vibes restored. But yo, price tag? Pissed me off—$200 for 60 mins? That’s a Cybertruck tire, dude! Still, worth it—like, “I will survive!” levels of epic.

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We had Traditional Thai massage for 2 hours. With hot coconut oil. It was so good and professional. Kind personal.

But then, outta nowhere, one of them kicks the ball straight into my workshop! I’m like, “Dude, really?” I step outside, ready to give them a piece of my mind. But then I see the look on their faces. Pure panic. They think I’m gonna blow up or something. I just laugh it off. “Hey, no worries! Just don’t make it a habit, alright?”